


We Save Ourselves

by ByTheAngell (SomeLittleInfamy)



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: 3B Trailer Spoilers, Angst, Hurt Magnus Bane, M/M, Protective Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-01
Updated: 2019-02-01
Packaged: 2019-10-20 04:11:07
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17615222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SomeLittleInfamy/pseuds/ByTheAngell
Summary: Watching the effects of Magnus' sacrifice play out before his eyes, Alec feels a fear he never thought he'd experience - the possibility of losing the man he loves far before his time.





	We Save Ourselves

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little thing inspired by the scene of Magnus convulsing on the floor of Alec's office from the 3B trailer, because of course that's what I latched onto.

“I NEED HELP IN HERE!” Alec screams the words at the top of his lungs, kneeling down beside Magnus on the rug of his office. A moment before his boyfriend was talking about going home to rest - he isn’t looking so great the past few days, but every time Alec asks how he’s feeling he dismisses it with a wave of his hand and a casual ‘I’m fine’ before changing the subject. 

It’s very clear now that Magnus Bane is far from fine, as he lays convulsing on the ground, blood dripping slowly from his nose. It isn’t a lot, but the sight of it is enough to send Alec into even more of a panic than before, just as Jace comes rushing into the room. He looks tense, which isn’t surprising given the fact that he’s feeling more anxiety and fear through his parabatai bond than he ever has before. 

“We’re calling every Warlock on file, one of them will be here soon.” Jace promises, hovering just to the side of them, not sure if he should try to help or keep his distance.    
  
“I don’t know what’s wrong... “ Alec has a hand on each of Magnus’ shoulders, doing his best to hold him still. “He was fine a minute ago…” 

But he wasn’t fine, and Alec knows this. He hasn’t been fine since he came back from Edom. And instead of telling Alec what’s wrong so that they could figure it out together, now Alec is left helpless to--

He’s granted pause in his rapidly spiralling thoughts when there’s the sound of a portal, and moments later Catarina is at Alec’s side, reaching out with hands that immediately wash over Magnus in every shade of blue imaginable. Alec pulls his hands out of the way immediately  “What happened?” She demands, doing her best to remain calm even though her hands shake slightly in the space above Magnus’ chest. 

“He just collapsed, Cat. I don’t--- he was standing there, talking, and then--” Alec can’t speak. He can’t breathe. The words get lost, lumping together in his throat while his lungs ache for a breath he can’t catch. Jace has a hand on his shoulder instantly, giving a tight squeeze of pressure to try and ground him again, but all Alec does is let out a choked sob, falling back on his heels. “Is he--” 

Catarina is silent for several agonizing seconds, all of her focus on Magnus. Those seconds grow to a minute, and then two, where dread fills Alec’s heart the longer his unfinished question hangs unanswered in the air. 

Until finally Cat’s hands stop moving, along with Magnus’ convulsions. She gives a long, relieved sigh before speaking again. 

“Yes, and no. When Magnus gave up his magic, a side-effect was losing his immortality as well.” 

The hand on Alec’s shoulder grips too tight at that revelation, Jace choking out a “What?!” of disbelief. 

Alec remains silent, but closes his eyes slowly, lips trembling in barely contained emotion. 

“He didn’t know when he did it. It wasn’t until recently he started to notice the signs - loss of strength and energy, rapidly graying hair - that he started to suspect. He wasn’t sure, though. He didn’t want to worry you if it was nothing--” 

“He shouldn't have kept that from me.” Alec bites out through clenched teeth. He isn't angry at Magnus, not really, but he needs somewhere to release the anger that's quickly becoming  _too much_. It isn't fair. Magnus doesn't deserve this.  _They_ don't deserve this. 

“I agree. For what it’s worth, I told him to talk to you about it, before… well, before something like this happened.” She sighs down at him. “I’ve stabilized him, but he’s in… I suppose the closest thing to a coma. Whether or not he wakes up from it-” she blinks a few stray tears back from her eyes, doing her best to remain strong enough for the both of them in this. “-that’s up to him now.” 

Alec looks from Magnus to Catarina, and back down to Magnus. He feels Jace’s hand on his shoulder, hears the muffled voices of other Shadowhunters outside of the room, but his attention is drawn back to Magnus every time. He can’t lose him. He doesn’t want to live without him, not this soon. Magnus was never supposed to be the one to go first… he was never supposed to go at all. 

Alec mutters something too low for Cat or Jace to hear, pushing himself abruptly to his feet. 

“Alec?” Cat asks, rising cautiously beside him. 

“No, it isn’t,” he repeats, louder this time, with more conviction. He’s moving, ignoring the protest of Jace’s hand trying to stop him. “It isn’t up to him now. It’s up to me.”

Alec feels the darkness threaten to consume him, but he doesn’t break. If he has any chance of saving himself, he needs to save Magnus first. 

“Alec, what are you doing?” Jace’s tone implies all of the concern of a brother, and the hesitation of a man who knows someone he cares about is about to do something reckless. 

Alec is grabbing a set of keys off of the desk, ignoring Jace and Catarina entirely until he’s trying to make his way out of the office again. He stops at the carpet, at the sight of magnus lying there, a layer of magic surrounding his body. He hesitates, suddenly unable to will his feet forward. 

He knows what he needs to do, but he doesn’t want to leave him here. Not if there’s a chance something might happen before he gets back. A chance that Magnus may not be here to save when he returns. 

“You’ll take care of him, won’t you? Keep him safe. Keep him…” he feels his throat close around the word, but he forces it out, because he has to say it. “Keep him alive until I get back.” He locks eyes with Catarina, pleading. 

“Where are you going?” She asks, but she doesn’t have to. She already knows the answer - she can tell by the fire in his eyes. 

“I’m going to get Magnus’ magic back.” 

**Author's Note:**

> (Find me on [Tumblr](http://bytheangell.tumblr.com) and also on [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/By_The_Angell) while we all hang out waiting for someone to #SaveShadowhunters ! <3 )


End file.
